And yes, I did key the old trollop's car door. If you can't get out of a car without causing damage to vehicles already parked then you deserve all the shit you get.
Reminds me of a time some 30 years ago when I returned to my car to find a bastard had angle-parked within 5 inches of mine. I was driving a Ford Escort window van at the time, 
very like the one in the attached pic, but white & without the fancy trim. The exterior door handles protruded & were quite solid.
I climbed in via the rear cargo doors, wriggled into place behind the steering wheel and opened the driver's side door. Violently. Into the offending vehicle's passenger door, leaving a shallow dent. It wasn't a shallow dent when I left the scene, as I'd repeated the door handle application twice more, with equal force. Fixed that bugger.